Just want to say thanks to the couple in the red 2000 Honda Civic who stopped right in front of my house on the corner in Kahului the other day just to have sex. I can’t remember the last time I was this lucky. Bet you didn’t know I’m the biggest perv on Maui! Don’t think you noticed, but when I saw you guys I ran in the house and grabbed my digital video camera so I could get the whole thing on tape. Yeah, your windows were tinted, but they weren’t that dark. Boy, your chick had quite a ride—ever thought about entering her in the Makawao Rodeo? Anyway, I guess the only problem I had with you guys (other than you not letting me join in) is that there were kids playing across the street. So the next time you decide to do it in my neighborhood, feel free to knock on my door and ask to use my bedroom. Of course, I get to watch you two go at it, but that’s better than exposing yourselves to children, right?