Eh Brah! That DVD player you sold me at your yard sale last weekend was a piece of crap. I guess I should’ve figured a $13 DVD player would suck, but there was—at first glance—a positive benefit. You left a movie in it. I thought I cashed in, until I noticed it was titled Toss My Salad. What kind of sick freak are you? If I thought it was a joke, I would appreciate it. But I think your lazy butt-sniffing ass just forgot to pull the disc. My kids were psyched about getting a free DVD. I had to tell them it was a cooking show. Thanks.
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