Mauitime Vault
Eh Backyard Camper
You’ve been crashing on our back patio swing for a couple months. You sleep late and then lurk at our house, morning and night. You should get up, look for housing and let us enjoy our backyard. If you truly appreciate having a safe place to sleep at night, give us a break and make yourself scarce during the day. Illustration by Ron Pitts … [Read more...] about Eh Backyard Camper
Eh Slipper Litterer
Eh Brah! I wasn’t the only one who saw you walking out of Long’s Drugstore in Kahului with a smile on your face and shiny new slippahs in your hand. We saw you take your feet out of the old ones, put on the new ones, and then walk away, leaving the price tag, as well as the discarded, worn-out slippahs on the pavement. I don’t get it. Do you think that because you were “Born … [Read more...] about Eh Slipper Litterer
Your Horoscope
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Lately you’ve felt as lacking in vocabulary as the family dog. You’ve tried your damnedest to communicate what you’ve been feeling, nonverbally, but it’s not coming across. Whenever you’ve attempted to actually speak, you’ve felt desperately at a loss for words. Quit panting and wagging your tail. No one’s getting it. Part of the problem, of … [Read more...] about Your Horoscope
Eh Newbie Spear Fisherman
To the newbie spear-fisherman at the Westside beach: Wow, you had a big new shiny gun but the fish that was dangling from it was quite manini! A snapper you say? Review your fishing regs, friend–even though you went “way out,” that was no snapper you caught. It was what we call a “kumu” and is not a snapper of any kind. The whiskers might have clued you in if you’d checked the … [Read more...] about Eh Newbie Spear Fisherman