By the Editors at Andrews McMeel
Good fortune quickly turned to horror for a man in Allyn, Washington, who scored some raccoon roadkill to use as crab-trap bait on June 25. As the unidentified man walked toward home dragging the carcass behind him on a 15-foot rope (so he couldn’t smell it), two different vehicles stopped, and their occupants, mistakenly thinking he was dragging a dead dog, began berating the would-be fisherman. As the dispute heated up, someone produced a gun, shooting the man twice in the leg before he was struck by one of the vehicles as the assailants fled.
In New Hampshire on June 29, a state police officer stopped the 57-year-old driver of a Honda Odyssey minivan who had piled a Beverly Hillbillies-esque stack of belongings on top of his car. The collection, which was about as tall as the minivan, included a wooden chest, a bike, a floor lamp, a rake, a snow shovel, a moving dolly and a folding ladder, along with blankets and towels and a shopping cart full of items hanging off the back. Police cited the driver for negligent driving, and the car was towed away.
SORRY I MISSED IT
A Canada Day parade in southern Ontario sparked a flood of typically mild protests over Dave Szusz’s float, which featured a three-meter-tall blow-up Jesus (holding a baby sheep) and several real sheep. “I thought it was kind of sad to see sheep out with very loud blasting music, out in the heat in the city,” said animal rights activist Dan MacDonald. Others flooded Szusz with complaints on Facebook. Szusz and MacDonald have since talked it out, although MacDonald still hopes Szusz will discontinue using sheep on his floats.
LEAST COMPETENT CRIMINALS
Six suspects in a June 25 Denver mugging counted among their spoils the victim’s brand-new iPhone. After using Ryan Coupens’ credit cards at a nearby Walgreens, the thieves used the phone to post a Snapchat story about their shenanigans to Coupens’ account, where his friends–and police–could clearly see some of their faces.
Flower girls at weddings often steal the show, and Georgiana Arlt of Chaska, Minnesota, was no exception as she walked down the aisle on July 1. The 92-year-old grandmother of the bride, Abby Arlt, told her granddaughter the only other wedding she had been in was her own, when she was 20 years old. Abby had hoped to have her grandfather as the ring bearer, but he passed away last year.
Karen Leclair, 51, of Albion, Pennsylvania, was reported missing on June 11 by her commercial fisherman husband, Christopher, 48, after she went over the side of his boat on Lake Erie. Christopher told police he hadn’t been watching when his wife fell overboard. When her body washed ashore on July 4 in upstate New York, however, she had a gunshot wound in her head, and she was bound by nylon fishing rope and weighted with an anchor. Christopher was charged with her murder after the gun used to shoot Karen was found under a bed in their home.
OH, THOSE MONKEYS
A monkey mystery unfolded near Mesa, Arizona, in early July as drone owner Jesse Sorensan dispatched his device over a facility rumored to house abandoned monkeys. “Hovered above it and took some pictures… and sure enough there’s monkeys in almost all the cages,” said Sorensan. “What are these monkeys doing… in the middle of the desert?” Local TV reporters looked into the mystery and found the facility is used for research and breeding for the University of Washington and the Centers for Disease Control, who were quick to point out that the monkeys have access to air conditioning and veterinary care.
WHO YOU GONNA CALL?
Villagers in the eastern Thailand province of Amnat Charoen have called in the Royal Thai Police Force to help rid them of an evil female spirit, “phi pob,” they accuse of killing four cows and sickening four border police officers, reported the BBC in June. In Thai folklore, phi pob can possess people and sow chaos, including a 2016 incident in which neighbors were forced to strip naked at gunpoint by three reportedly possessed individuals. Adul Chaitprasithkul, the local police chief, noted, “More people believe in phi pob than those who don’t.”
Police in Dearborn, Michigan, are hoping a thief’s unusual loot may draw him back to the scene of the crime. Surveillance video at a Walgreens store captured a bald man making off with seven boxes of Rogaine, a hair-growth product, on June 22. “While this is not the most hair-raising crime… it is suspected he will continue committing this type of crime, as 12 to 14 months of consistent use is needed to see results,” Police Chief Ronald Haddad said in a news release.