In last week’s feature (“The Seven Worst Things Ever Introduced to Hawaii”) we used (and perhaps coined) the phrase “faux-waiiana” to describe cheap “Hawaiian” trinkets that are made overseas, shipped in and sold to unsuspecting tourists. Pleased with our cleverness, we decided to submit the word to Urban Dictionary.
Here’s the definition we provided:
Anything branded with “Hawai’i” or representing Hawai’i, that is not made in Hawai’i. Including but not limited to cheesy tchotchkes, tikis carved in China, and leis grown and sewn in the Philippines.
“Eh, brah. Some sad, eh? All da faux-waiiana junks get fo’ sale dat say “Hawai’i” on ’em, no stay from Hawai’i?!”
“Like faux-hawaiiana, we’ve created an impression of a fantasy land, which has therefore become what people accept — and what we accept of ourselves.” – MauiTime; December 2, 2010; Volume 14 Issue 24
And here's the response we got from Urban Dictionary:
Thanks for your definition of faux-waiiana!
Editors reviewed your entry and have decided to not publish it.
To get a better idea of what editors publish and reject, sign up as an Urban Dictionary Editor here: http://editor.urbandictionary.com/
Man, they got us all juiced with the exclamation point then totally cock smacked us. But good call — let’s get a better idea of what editors publish and reject. Maybe their standards are just very high, and our word didn’t measure up. We can accept that; we’re used to rejection.
Here are a couple of the definitions currently gracing Urban Dictionary’s main page:
The pale skin of a person who plays Xbox and doesn’t get any sunlight.
“yo tim hasn’t come out in days.”
“yer he’s playing Xbox working on his Dungeon Tan.”
an individual who is highly amused by anything associated with flatuation [sic].
“LuAnn was such a fart enthusiast that, upon the mention of a fart, she doubles over with laughter.”
Wow, who knew Mark Twain had been resurrected for the sole purpose of submitting definitions to Urban Dictionary?
OK, so we can’t compete with “fart enthusiast.” But faux-waiiana isn’t that bad. Surely they could find room for it somewhere, being as this is the Internet and all. Maybe we broke their rules?
Here’s a snip from their terms and conditions:
Users may not post Content (as defined below) that:
- is unlawful, threatening, libelous or defamatory;
- violates any party’s intellectual property; or
- is detrimental to the quality or intended spirit of the Website.
It’s possible they were worried about number 2, since we included (our own) quote. But it seems like they could have simply deleted the quote, or checked to make sure we were really from MauiTime. Whatever. They’re probably still laughing about “fart enthusiast” and are simply too busy.
If the good people at Urban Dictionary happen to read this and want to offer an explanation as to why our word didn’t make the cut, we’d love to hear it. In the meantime, we’ll be over in the corner, picking up the pieces of our shattered egos.