Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Forget about what’s “appropriate” for a minute. There are lines and then there are lines. In order to properly live you’re inevitably going to cross some of them. (If you don’t, your life will be dull and pointless.) Your job is to figure out which are important for you to preserve, and which should simply be discarded, and to hell with anyone who gives a shit about it. That, my dear, is this week’s task, and it’s not even half as easy as it sounds. Some of those boundaries you want to cross are likely to be fiercely guarded—so be prepared to face some opposition. Stay strong, and don’t back down.
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)
Your ego has gotten you into (perhaps embarrassing) trouble before, so when you take offense at something, there’s a part of you that gets a little worried, too. Is this just another case of overly prickly Leonine pride? Or do you have just cause to take affront? There’s no way to tell except by enlisting a reasonably impartial, preferably non-melodramatic third party to clue you in (someone who loves drama is going to want you to go there no matter what). Find someone levelheaded and logical if you can, and then, regardless of how you feel, do what they say—or you’ll regret it, later.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
Improving your mate can be very hard to resist, but please try. You may have only the best intentions, but your reminders, advice, and counsel can all too easily cross over into nagging territory—and that’s no fun for anyone, including you. Of course, everyone has things they can and should work on—what you can improve upon is letting others have their faults and flaws and simply getting the hell over it. That’s not to mean you should let everything slide, of course—but until you can let most things slide, no one’s going to be that happy, especially not you.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
Let’s just be real here: your expectations are probably too high. You may think you could do or be more if you were wearing another’s shoes, but that’s probably not particularly realistic; when you’re disappointed, you’re best off keeping it to yourself. If someone’s behavior or performance was truly sub-par, rest assured they’ll hear about it from someone else. You get to be supportive, encouraging, and non-critical, which—let’s face it—is a whole lot more fun, anyway. Let your job be about being happy with what you’ve got this week, instead of wanting more. Know what the best part is? Try to be happy and content, and you will be.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
People live in denial and delusion all the time, and it’s not always your duty to wake them up or clue them in. When it becomes your job is when you’re the one enabling them to live in their persistent fantasy, and you just don’t want to anymore. Bursting bubbles is no fun, but sometimes it’s necessary. This week, you may have to have one of those awful sit-down chats where you slap someone awake to the reality of the situation, a reality they’ve tried very hard not to notice or acknowledge. However, if you don’t, you’ll be the one trying to escape your reality pretty soon.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-DEC.21)
You already know that not every “problem” needs solving—particularly not the ones that are pretty much unsolvable. However, some people have yet to learn this valuable lesson, and feel compelled to go on about some mad crusade to right all the world’s wrongs and correct everyone’s shortcomings. Help these guys out—not by supporting their campaign, but by pointing out just how foolish and foolhardy it is. “Pick your battles” is a concept that has yet to dawn on these poor souls; perhaps this week you could gently but firmly and persistently introduce it to one or two of them?
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
The question this week isn’t about whether someone deserves your help, or if you’re obligated to offer it, but actually much more simple: can you help? If you can, you should. Sometimes these things are much more complex, but right now forget all the ramifications and just focus on the matter at hand. Someone’s in need. If you can give them a hand in some way, please do so. You may reconsider your decision or even withdraw your aid if you want, next week or next year, but right now, it’s a simple question with a yes or no answer.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
Imagine that while standing on a balcony, you saw someone walking below, not paying attention, and thus in danger of falling into an open manhole. Hopefully, you’d feel some obligation to call out to this total stranger to try to prevent this accident from happening. I bring up this implausible scenario because this week you may have the advantage of perspective in a certain situation, giving you more insight than someone else involved, someone who may be walking into similarly painful or disastrous circumstances unawares. You might not want to get involved, but how will you feel when they suffer because you were too chicken or apathetic to holler a simple warning?
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)
Believe it or not, Pisces are generally luckier in love than most other signs. However, you do occasionally find yourself with an abundance of affection and no one to shower it upon. You could of course, desperately get out there and try to find someone who’s receptive to all this adoration and attention you’ve got on offer, but chances are that’s going to prove fruitless, annoying, or ultimately disappointing. Seek an alternative: get a pet or, better yet—lavish all that love upon yourself. This is easier said than done—but it’s this week’s challenge.
Aries (March 21-April 19)
Being an untamed thing is fantastic in my book, but I value all the things that make life more pleasantly surprising and fascinating; your wild ways definitely qualify. However, not everyone shares my appreciation. Some people are only happy if you fit neatly into the box they’ve built for you. It should be obvious to you that they’re looking for someone that’s not you, instead of assuming there’s something wrong with you for feeling cramped, trapped, or, well, boxed in. However, some Rams get tricked into feeling inadequate when they chafe at such restrictions. If you’d like to break free, finally, this week is an awesome time to do so.
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
Just because you don’t understand someone’s weird balloon fetish or fondness for artichoke liqueur doesn’t mean you should heap scorn upon it. Even though you think your taste is impeccable, you haven’t actually won the title Arbiter of What’s Cool and What’s Not. Life is full of exciting stuff that simply won’t meet your standards, and that’s okay. You’re happy with your life the way it is, and no one’s forcing you to expand your horizons beyond your comfort zone. All we ask—this week and in general—is that you allow others their mostly harmless pleasures and interests without judgment (even the silent kind).
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
Abdicating responsibility for your own actions and choices won’t work. Sometimes, as when people join AA or the like, it’s because they’ve exhausted other options, but that’s not the case here. Whether you admit it to yourself or not, you’re only pretending you’re powerless. In fact you’re more than powerful enough to choose differently—if you want to. If you don’t want to (as I suspect), that’s another matter entirely. In that case, simple own and admit to your own obstinacy, instead of pretending you’re a pawn of forces that are out of your control.