Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)
I imagine your emotion-ruled soul as a vast, often turbulent, ocean. Compared to that, your logic-ruled consciousness is about as impressive as a four year-old with floaties on his arms. This week brings high tides and huge waves. If you’ve been practicing long enough, you can try surfing them and possibly achieve wildly exhilarating (if a bit out of control) heights, or if not, you can safely dive beneath them—which in itself is exhausting but doable. Persist and you’ll get to relatively calm emotional waters, and a unique chance to paddle out and explore. Do it. There’s at least one cool surprise out there waiting for you to find it.
Aries (March 21-April 19)
You remember that little dream? The one that fell off your glory train a big hill or two ago? It was a loose caboose of a dream that derailed and rolled down into the valley below. In the interest of getting all your other goals and responsibilities safely to their destinations, you had to let it go. But a curious turn of events this week may just bring you to a loop of track that runs so close to that discarded dream that you can hitch that baby right back on. I can’t imagine why you wouldn’t.
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
While you’ve rarely been so eloquent expressing your emotions, you’ve also rarely been so conflicted. At last, you can give someone an accurate road map to your inner self, but somehow it still doesn’t help; every signpost points in multiple directions, including up, down, and back the way you came. Don’t freak; this is the perfect opportunity to remind yourself (and any travel companions that might be tagging along) that the journey is way more important than the destination. All these roads lead to the same place, essentially. Now it’s up to you: how exactly would you like to get there?
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
This week, impetuous romance is in; heartfelt emotional processing is out. I can’t really tell you what to do (it’d hardly be spontaneous then, would it?) but I can tell you what to steer clear of: Anything that reeks of the familiar (even the pleasantly familiar) is a definite no-no. If it smacks of the routine or the regular, avoid it like the plague. And above all, don’t drag your lover into the dirty laundry pile that’s been building in your emotional closet. You can air that shit out next week, when you’re riding on the glow from this one. For now, keep that door shut and get out there and do something fun.
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
I’m impressed by your daring heist robbing your lover’s spiritual safe-deposit boxes of all those supposedly valuable insecurities. But you’re not supposed to sneak into people’s private vaults and steal from them. That you have the wisdom to not only rob them of their most precious and self-destructive illusions but the panache to do it without setting off any alarms is what’s truly outstanding. Congratulations! Now if only we could rid you of the pesky delusion that any of the aforementioned feats are possible. Don’t think you can painlessly dissect people’s longstanding self-deceptions from their lives—sometimes the only way you can get them to see the truth is to hit them in the face with it.
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)
Unlike other fire signs, you’re not blinded by your passions. You’ll ride the flash flood force of whatever surging emotion thunders your way, but at the same time deftly survey the rapids ahead and paddle like mad to save not only your skin, but your heart, too. Aren’t you exhausted from being constantly in control? How delicious would it be to share the burden of staying on top of things with someone equally capable? Sure, you could lose an inflatable rubber boat and a pair of plastic paddles, but you could gain a fellow adventurer you know you can trust—a worthwhile risk.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
What did you expect exactly, a tickertape parade? Although your latest creation’s reception was more lukewarm than you’d like, you shouldn’t get too pissed off about it. Many artists and geniuses aren’t appreciated until long after they’re dead. The bad news is that you’re not likely to get any kind of immediate acclaim or recognition for your brilliance. The good news is that you won’t have to wait until some posthumous awards ceremony to finally get the praise and acknowledgment you deserve; it may come as early as next month. Try to have a little patience, baby. It’ll pay off.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
“You reap what you sow” should have special resonance for you this week. Some seeds are easy; you can throw them almost anywhere and they’ll grow, even under inhospitable conditions, wrenching themselves up through a crack in the sidewalk or clinging to the rocky face of a snowy mountain. Others require more before they’ll sprout: fires, floods, extremely specific temperatures, the right type of soil, etc. So far you’ve been casually scattering seeds left and right, but unless you take some time to at least water (and maybe fertilize) the ones you really care about, your life will soon be overrun with weeds and not much else.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
“May you get what you want.” Is it blessing or curse? My buddy tells me that getting what you want is as simple as asking for it; consequently, he’s carefully avoided asking for complicated things like love and romance, because then he’d have to deal with getting them. Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on your perspective, the universe is so primed to deliver your desire that it might fixate on the most random of comments. So you don’t end up with a joke of a cosmic present, spend this week figuring out what it is you really want more than anything else. Then ask for it.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
You may have hit on a workable formula for modest success. It was probably even easy for you to figure out. There’s a way things are done, and if you’re good enough at it, you’ve pretty much got it made. However, there are other, more original ways to hit it big, in whatever sense you like. The vision you’re contemplating is one of these. Look ahead; you know what your life on the Footpath of the Sure Thing would be like. But imagine if you had the courage to take the Boulevard of your Wildest Dreams. Guess what? You do. Now don’t chicken out.
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
Now that you’ve decided to release any and all pent-up aggression before it further corrodes your insides, you’ve got to figure out a way to do it without causing yourself more angst. Somehow I doubt that popping a sheet of bubble wrap is going to cut it. It’s time to get a little more hardcore about releasing your anger. At the very least, rent some time in a batting cage where you can hit the hell out of some balls; it might even be time to make an appointment with a brick wall and stack of thrift store china. Please do finally un-dam those years of unexpressed rage, but don’t forget the second, more important part—figuring out someplace for the flood to go.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
Despite months of preparation, it’s not until the starting bell has sounded that you realize a few things: As expected, you’re in a kickboxing ring, about to duke it out with the greatest single source of your most debilitating insecurities. But with panic you realize you forgot the mouthpiece that’s supposed to guard your teeth, the padded headgear designed to prevent brain damage, or any other protective equipment. Unfortunately, there’s no backing out now without forfeiting the match, especially not with the frenzied screams of half-mad onlookers urging you on. Still, I predict that if you stay alert, make use of your newfound flexibility, and keep moving, you’ll win this fight without your protective gear; without, in fact, your opponent even landing a punch.
Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)