Pisces (Feb. 19-March 20)
I can understand German pretty well by now, but it still requires a degree of concentration; if Germans are conversing nearby, I need to really focus on it to properly eavesdrop; otherwise, it’s easy to simply tune out, unlike a similar conversation in English, which would filter in no matter what. The “trouble” you’re in this week is something like me overhearing a German speaking into their cellphone–you’d really have to be paying special attention to notice it at all. I don’t think ignoring potential problems is a good idea in general, but in this case your problem only exists if you kind of help it along, by looking especially for it–so don’t.
Aries (March 21-April 19)
Remember Dumbo’s magic feather? The one he thought enabled him to fly? It turns out he could flap his ears and soar without that imaginary prop. Similarly, you’re perfectly capable of doing whatever it is you’re up to without the crutch you imagine necessary. No need to get all dramatic on it and quit everything cold turkey, right now. But an experiment regarding at least temporarily removing potential crutches from your life could have interesting results.
Taurus (April 20-May 20)
If Trump supporters had to physically do the mental acrobatics required to keep believing in our train wreck of a president, they could easily get jobs as contortionists in a freak show. It takes a special kind of delusional flexibility to look at someone who is so obviously and blatantly not a good person, who is incoherent, egotistical, ignorant, racist, and a pathological liar and say, “I support that man.” Unfortunately, many of your tribe have exactly this kind of determined stubbornness. Whether it’s Trump or something else you’ve decided to back, no questions asked, it may be time to reconsider that position. You’re not immune to mistakes, and that’s okay. What’s not okay is refusing to admit you may have made one when there’s so much evidence you have.
Gemini (May 21-June 20)
There may be a huge difference between cubic zirconium and a real diamond, or between high-quality gold leaf and the 24 karat kind. Most people, however, can’t tell which is which, unless they see a price tag. If the “fake” ring looks identical to the real one to anyone but a professional jeweler, what difference does it make? You’ve recently been obsessed with authenticity, and mostly I admire that. It’s often important. But there are some things that really are just about appearances, and what’s beneath doesn’t really matter. This week, accept the “ring” without wondering whether it’s cut glass or “the real thing.”
Cancer (June 21-July 22)
Our nation is experiencing dangerous growing pains. There is so much good coming out of the misery of our current president and social climate. Women, people of color, LGBTQ+ people–all are getting more visibility and more of a voice than they have historically. And I hope that a lot of positive change can (eventually) come out of the platform we have seized for ourselves. Often positive change comes from negative experiences. I hope that is true for our nation. I know it is true for you, this week!
Leo (July 23-Aug. 22)
I tried to look at the eclipse a while back. The weather, however, interfered, so all I could see were dimly illuminated clouds. Oh well. Shit happens. I mention it because you’ve spent an undue amount of time and energy lately kicking yourself about stuff that you had little to no control over. I know you hate feeling helpless, but in this case exaggerating, even in your own mind, how much power you actually have is simply self-destructive. Sometimes we really are quite limited as to what we can do, and it’s better to simply accept that.
Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)
I recently gave a friend some advice about “listening to the universe” and not trying to force things to happen. He’d come up with a plan, but when he put feelers out about his idea, he encountered nothing but setbacks and obstacles; consequently I suggested he table his plan for a while. I’m not saying we ought to give up whenever the going gets rough, but paying attention to signs like these isn’t a terribly bad idea. There might turn out to be a better time or method to accomplish what you hope. If what you’re up to this week isn’t going especially well (and it’s not incredibly time-sensitive or urgent), consider putting it on the back burner, until something changes.
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)
Let’s say you own a business, but you experience frequent complaints from your customers about long waits. Imagine your solution was to simply remove clocks from the area they’re waiting in, so people somehow won’t notice how long they’ve been waiting. I hope I don’t need to point out how useless and impractical such a solution is, compared to somehow making their wait either shorter or more entertaining. Removing clocks wouldn’t solve a thing. Unfortunately, that is something akin to the slapdash solution you’ve applied to a current problem you’ve been having. Time to rethink and apply a real solution before someone (else) calls you out.
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)
You’ve heard this before but it bears repeating: you reap what you sow. You’re acting like a gardener who goes out to their vegetable patch, then acts surprised that what’s come up is corn, carrots, and tomatoes, instead of peas, okra and broccoli. Unless they’re especially clueless or someone played a cruel, elaborate joke on them, the plants that grew are the ones whose seeds they planted, so they have no right to complain. To be fair, you might be upset because only corn and tomatoes grew, when you also planted, right next to them, seeds for cauliflower and potatoes. Maybe you put the seeds in the wrong place, or in the wrong kind of soil, or gave them too much or too little water. Shit happens. Move on, and eat your vegetables, instead of complaining about the ones that aren’t there.
Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)
Some things look better with a bit of tarnish. Unless it’s a computer or other hi-tech gadget, I don’t particularly like the look of anything that appears to be brand-new. Most things look better with some wear, from books to clothes to buildings. People do, too. Sure, you don’t necessarily want someone who’s worn out, but a few scars and scratches, evidence of having lived, can be incredibly hot. You’ve lived, and survived some pretty rough patches. That’s sexy, which is why I’m confounded whenever you try to hide that and appear more innocent or less battle-scarred than you are. Flaunt it baby. Anyone who’s going to get as close as you want them to is going to find your scars, anyway, so why not show them off from the get-go?
Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)
Just as the most homophobic people back in high school were almost invariably closet queers, those shitting on their peers in your life are the ones most guilty of whatever they’re persecuting. They’re looking in a mirror and not liking what they’re seeing. Keep that in mind as you fight the good fight–those on the other side may merit your scorn and derision for being such haters, but they deserve an ounce of compassion, too. What they hate is probably something inside themselves, and that’s got to be hard to live with. Don’t cut them any slack, but remember that they’re suffering, all the time, just by being themselves.
Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)
Wanting to be in love isn’t the same as actually being in love, and you know it. You might try to pretend otherwise, but wishful thinking isn’t going to make something work. Luckily, I’m referring not to you, but to one of your closest friends (although if those words rang true for you, I’d take a second to look at whatever’s going on). Someone you know and adore might be deluding themselves with good intentions and high hopes, and it’s your thankless job to disabuse them of those foolish and dreamy notions. Be kind, my dear. Don’t shirk your duty, of course–but be gentle while you do it.
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