I’ve been meaning to go on vacation lately but I never seem to have the time. Finally, the other night I got off my arse and to my surprise, ended up on a cruise ship of sorts.
“Welcome aboard the S. S. Golden Delicious!”
Smiling deck hands in sailor hats greeted me as I sat down at the Iao Theater to enjoy an evening variety show on the “ship.” I was soon surrounded by overly friendly nuns that seemed to come from nowhere and everywhere at the same time. Any thoughts of just sitting and enjoying the show quickly dissipated when I realized no one in the audience was safe. The spotlight had no boundaries.
I don’t usually consider nuns the life of the party, but this is different. On stage, the ship had met some misfortunes. After seven days of tumultuous seas, the nuns had been pulled in to perform the variety show since virtually all the paid actors were, well, let’s just say, a little green.
It didn’t take me long to warm up to the girls—uh, I mean sisters. They actually had some rhythm and the angels did bless them with song. As cliche as it is, I must admit they did carry the air of penguins at times, in garb and in action.
Reverend Mother (Julie Frank) was the stern mother who, when the other nuns weren’t looking, was actually the party master. She also started getting all buddy-buddy with Howard (James Langford), the only actor who fared the storm without the brown paper bag.
The stage couldn’t hide much. Sister Robert Anne (Lina Krueger-Miller) and Sister Mary Hubert (Laura Bloom Farber) were starting to feel a little ousted by the “Tev and Rev” show. Sister Hubert’s quick thinking had her plotting to become the next Revered Mother.
There was also an amusing magic show performed by Sister Amnesia (Kirsten Fredericksen) but my favorite was her forbidden puppet shows. She got a little carried away and ended up tossing Sister Amnesia overboard. It took awhile to get her back on the boat but Sister Robert Anne (Lina Krueger-Miller) entertained us with an amazing song. Her performance was incredible.
Although the items from the duty free cart were entertaining, if I could bottle up a nun and take one home I would take Sister Amnesia. Her humor mixed with her innocence was something I could’ve watched all night. It made me think that a little memory loss might actually be good for us once in awhile. MTW