There’s nothing in this world so sweet as love. And next to love the sweetest thing is hate. – Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
Things I Hate to Love
1. Happily married couples. Happily married couples with kids.
2. Red meat. I would sooo be a vegetarian if it weren’t for the cheeseburgers, barbequed ribs, pepperoni pizza, grilled hot dogs, burnt bacon and juicy, rare steaks.
3. Ex-boyfriends I don’t talk to through no fault of my own, who are getting married, having a kid or both.
4. Premium vodka and all its pretentious cocktails. Presses, Cosmos, Martinis—I feel like an asshole every time I order one. Even that Absolut Peppar Bloody Mary I had this morning.
5. In ‘N Out Burger. Yeah, I know it’s a chain.
6. Justin Timberlake, Beyonce, Pussycat Dolls… and okay, yes, Coldplay.
7. Mainland cities, for all their mean, cold and dingy dirtiness. How living in them nobody knows you, and you may never know your neighbors. How expensive it is to rent a tiny apartment that inevitably has no yard, thin walls, and windows that look out onto the brick building six inches away from yours.
Things I Love to Hate
1. Couples, especially married. Even worse if they’re happy and have kids.
2. Non-premium tequila and guys who order shots of it for me, or any of my girl friends.
3. Chain restaurants like Red Lobster, Olive Garden, Marie Callender’s, et al.
4. American Idol and Scarlett Johansson, for the same reason.
5. Reggae music. It’s not so much a “hate” but I’ve seen about all the festivals I can take for one lifetime.
6. Maui, for all its quaint, familial, small-town, two-lane-road pastoral charm, paradisiacal tropical island living with easy access to a myriad sparsely inhabited and debris-free beaches and warm, crystal-clear blue ocean, the supreme beauty of ‘Iao Valley and Haleakala Crater, their rolling green slopes and abundance of agriculture that’s utilized in mouthwatering local cuisine, the waterfalls of Hana and fresh water pools bordered by lush native foliage and majestic koa trees. The unadulterated affability of its residents and the community of those seeking to sustain their perfect, peaceful life as they know it… Yeah, I hate all that.
Samantha Campos somehow still has to find the time for guitar lessons and skydiving. MTW