You bummed a smoke. I only had three left, but I gave you one. Then you bummed a light. Then you asked for some change, and I told you I didn’t have any. This was the moment when you should have said, “Thanks man,” and walked away. Instead, you start chewing my ear about your sick dog and your cheating girlfriend and how you got ripped off, and how if only “jerk-offs” like me would see that you’re not a bum but just a guy who’s down on his luck, maybe you could get back on your feet. Excuse me? I work three jobs to pay the rent on a crappy one-bedroom and the alimony to my ex and, oh yeah, to have a little left over to buy smokes and enjoy them in peace. Next time you want something from me, it’d better be a sock in the jaw or you’re outta luck.