Hey Mr. Unicycle Guy: riding on one wheel doesn’t make you more interesting—it makes you more of a jackass. I don’t have a problem with unicycles per se; I wasn’t raped by a circus performer or anything like that. But I do have a problem with arrogant jerks who ride them on the sidewalk, nearly knocking people over and then offering up a little “who me?” smile as they pedal on their merry way. Then again, considering the insane sunburn you were rocking and the fact that you looked like the love child of a Swedish agoraphobe and an albino, skin cancer will probably get you around the same time karma does. Pack up that stupid contraption and be gone.