Eh brah, what were you thinking when you spray-painted our fence?! You really went to town on ours, and several others in Makawao and Pukalani. Graffiti is one thing, but a really large penis? Who does that? Clearly, you have issues that you might not want to talk about, but you’re ruining fences, beautiful rock walls and cars. You better stop now, because if we catch you, a lot of people are gonna know about whatever issue you’re trying to compensate for…

Illustration: Ron Pitts