Eh brah, quit driving like you’re a tourist. I know you live here because your car’s clearly not a rental and the boards strapped to the roof are definitely yours. So why didn’t you stop at the crosswalk when you saw that guy with a dog trying to cross? They live here, too. Next time, please stop like you’re supposed to. We can’t let Maui become any more like the mainland.
Illustration: Ron Pitts