Hey you, middle-aged frumpy gal: You sit on your lanai and chain-smoke all day which means all of your neighbors have to smell your nasty cigarette smoke. We also love watching you fling your lung cookies off the balcony throughout the day. And we can hardly wait for you to go to sleep so we can lie in our beds listening to your cough and hack all night. Please go inside with your trash habits!
Illustration by Ron Pitts