“Duuuuuuude, this made me cream my panties. No lie,” wrote MauiTime’s own Ynez Tongson on my Facebook page, in response to a paparazzi-snapped photo of Paris Hilton (nonchalantly not) shielding her face with our recent Taste of Maui issue. (For Hilton’s Twitter dish on the whole shebang, see this week’s Quizunderstood, page 8 of our print edition.)
And, rumor has it, MPD employed the same tactics with our all-purpose paper, when gallantly coming to this heiress’s aid. (Though Officer Keith Taguma recently told our art director Chris Skiles that the only thing we’re good for is picking up his dog’s poo. Hmm. Wonder why?) While I could give two poops about Paris, it’s admittedly hard not to love photographic evidence of our pub’s wide appeal. (Honestly, I was unaware Hilton could read. That’s what BFF’s are for, right “bitches”?)
Ynez’s butyraceous (it’s a word; look it up) sentiments were likewise returned, when she posted her own Facebook photo album titled “MauiTime Gets Around” (apparently, even more than Hilton). See, Ynez’s flashes of genius are akin to the perpetual storm of Jupiter’s Great Red Spot, and while recently traversing Japan and Los Angeles, she had the presence of mind to photograph issues of MauiTime and a retro press pass in Osaka, Kyoto, Tokyo (even, more specifically, around the famed Harajuku Station of the city’s Shibuya ward), downtown LA and Orange County’s Discovery Center in Santa Ana (where in one pic, a T-Rex skull—which has more brains than Hilton—is “om-nom-noming” a Taste of Maui issue).
This prompted comments from alert (online) readers like Bion Howard, who said, “Last October I saw a copy in a boutique hotel lobby, in Saigon Dist. 1!! Wish I had a photo to prove it.” (We do too.) Our hope now is that this will inspire others to snap globe-spanning images of our fine publication and send them in (seedy night vision welcome).
MauiTime in Osaka, Japan. Photo by Ynez Tongson.
OK. A few too many Paris Hilton jokes—and not even good ones, at that. But when it comes to promoting MauiTime, I’ll limbo in a skirt; no shame, brah. (BTW, have you heard about ZEPTEMBER?) And hey, speaking of shameless self-promotion: it’s almost election time! It’s easy to get cynical, but these are the peeps who, for better or worse, will helm our Valley Isle vessel in this “loveliest fleet of islands anchored in any ocean” (so says Maui fan Mark Twain).
So for this Saturday’s primary, I’m peeling off my proverbial “ainokea” bumper sticker, replacing it with the “I Voted!” one and ensuring each and every box I check is backed by careful thought. Personally, I’m gonna pull a Paris and arm myself with MauiTime (e.g. last week’s Primary Election Endorsements issue). Regardless of the resources (if any) you employ before doing your civic duty, I hope you’ll join me.