Q: What is Maui Time Weekly’s address and phone number? A: Why do you want to know that? Does someone at Maui Time Weekly owe you money? What difference does it make where we’re located? Look, pal—if this is about that deal that went down in Miami, I’ll tell you what I told the cops: that guy was asleep when I left him at 2 a.m. I have no idea how his car got pushed … [Read more...] about Infrequently Asked Questions
Dear Loud Guy at the Bar, My husband and I have been happily married for six years, but I’m becoming concerned that he’s having an affair. He’s been more chipper than usual, there are strange numbers on our phone bill, he sometimes comes home with the scent of Paris by Yves Saint Laurent about him (I always wear Revlon’s Ciara Femme Fatale) and on two occasions I came home … [Read more...] about Ask that Loud Guy at the Bar
Anyone who’s flown into Hawaii knows all about the Mandatory Declaration form. One side is the state Department of Agriculture form where you list any plants or animals you’re bringing into the state. Flip it over and you have the state Department of Business, Economic Development & Tourism’s not-so mandatory questionnaire about the purpose of your visit. Recently Maui Time … [Read more...] about I Declare!
BEST BEACH FOR BARBECUING Launiupoko Park No one really knows why, but barbecuing at the beach is a part of American culture. Maybe it’s the way the salty sea air mixes with the burning coals, or perhaps people just get giddy eating a hamburger seconds after they’ve come out of the water. Who cares. But the small beach park at Launiupoko is the best place for grilling up … [Read more...] about MauiTime Best of Maui 2004: Best Beach for Barbecuing on Maui: Launiupoko Park
BEST PLACE TO BODY SURF Big Beach The waves are big, the sand is soft and the water is clean. What more do you want—Halle Berry in a thong holding your hand as you enter and exit the surf? Hey, that’s not a bad idea… [GT] … [Read more...] about MauiTime Best of Maui 2004: Best Place to Body Surf on Maui: Big Beach