Inspired Art: Give the unique gift of a piece of art

The most unique gift you can offer a friend is a piece of original art. Head to galleries or art fairs for individual, hand-made works that will speak volumes and last a lifetime. Or just contact the artist directly, like MauiTime’s own Ron Pitts. Garth Marriott original art–Maui Hands, 612 Front St., Lahaina Lahaina Art […]

Annual MauiTime Eh Brah Issue: Damn, Our Readers Hate Traffic!


More than half of drivers in Hawaii believe that people on the road are not as courteous as they were just five years ago, reports a new survey commissioned by First Insurance Company. What’s more, reported the Associated Press on June 26, a mere 18 percent of drivers still use the venerable shaka to acknowledge […]

Sideswiped in Kahului!


This is for the ass who sideswiped me as I was riding my bike one recent morning on Dairy Road in Kahului. You were leaving the parking lot next to McDonald’s with your phone in your hand (and clearly didn’t even look for people on bikes, like me) as you made your turn onto the […]

Stop Yelling At Your Beautiful Girlfriend!


Eh Brah! You look really cool yelling at your beautiful girlfriend in public. It really makes you look like you’re in control of your pathetic, plaid wearing, illiterate, comb-less life of yours. It’s no surprise that you’re too busy “crying over spilled milk” to notice that the incoming phone call from “MOM” is coincidentally the […]

Eh Brah!


We were walking from the Paia parking lot toward Mana Foods on the sidewalk. You were smiling and making eye contact, walking toward us with your adorable lab-type puppy on a leash. I start making baby voice noises at the dog because, well, I love cute puppies. You, still an apparently normal dog lover, didn’t […]

Eh Brah!

Elton John

I see you every weekend in your golf cart with the red cover that says “Players Assistant.” You’re usually hiding in the resort parking lot or sitting under shade trees. The golf course gives you the duties of “Players Assistant”—it’s too bad that you do everything but! You zoom past players on the course like […]

Eh Brah!


Hey haole boy, here’s some free some advice for you: 1. Don’t steal a giraffe-print, seven-gear cruiser straight out of my garage… It leaves a bad taste in the mouth. 2. Don’t attempt to sell said giraffe-print cruiser… Word gets around the island quickly with that coconut wireless. 3. Never doubt a girl from New […]

Eh Brah


So my husband and I were out enjoying a beautiful evening while wandering from shop to shop, perusing art here and there. And then we came into your gallery. We asked you about a piece of art that was hanging there. You talked briefly about it. Then we asked you if the artist was a […]

Eh Brah!

wailuku first friday

Last week we called you for an emergency and you guys were there! I never got a chance to thank you for your aloha and your driving skills. My wife went into unexpected labor on the Westside and you guys knew the baby wasn’t going to wait until we got to the hospital. So you […]

Eh Brah!

ladysmith black mambazo by citylifedotcodotuk

Are you kidding me? I come home from work to find our sink exploded with dishes and the smell of rotting food throughout the house. Get your lazy ass up and clean! But that’s nothing—why were your pee-soaked shorts lying in front of the toilet? Wait, I don’t want to know. And please stop asking […]

Eh Brah!


Eh Brah! This one is for you, the ever so brilliant boat driver who likes to show off and go way too fast into and out of and the Kihei Harbor boat ramp. I know you are used to having the ocean all to yourself, or you just think you do, since you often go […]

Eh Brah!


To the jogger who shouts a fundamentalist religious motto while holding prayer beads associated with another tradition whenever I’m walking past: I get it. It’s your mission to gather up as many “wayward souls” as you can—including people of other faiths—as long as you can shout your message while running in the opposite direction and […]

Eh Brah! The Key To A Good Maui Vacation


A big thank-you to the kind woman on Big Beach who found our car key in a plastic bag in the water and asked around, then gave it to the lifeguard. We had scraped together enough money to take our kids to Maui for a week after a long, hard time at the end of […]

Eh Brah! Throwing Stones at Old Rockers

Please, get some new material for your hippie painted-guitar act. You may think everyone loves a middle aged chick dancing on the bar–but sister and brother “rockers,” that’s where we eat. Seems like wherever we go these days, it’s the same old “Layla” and “Freebird” flowing out of the local bars and restaurants from the […]

Eh Brah! Taking a Checkout Stand

Eh lady at the checkstand: it’s bad enough you’re trying to slide at least 20 items through the express lane, but then you go and grab a trashy tabloid and start reading it while the checker’s trying to ring you up. She had to ask you to enter your pin three times, then you rolled […]

Eh Brah! Butts Off Maui Beaches


This goes out to the smokers. I know you have it rough. I know the number of places you’re allowed to puff has basically been reduced to your home and a small patio in Beirut. But pretty please: don’t leave your butts on the beach. It’s an old gripe, I know, but it’s also a […]