Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) You easily resolve conflicts of interest between head and loins, unlike those squirrelly Geminis or those oversexed Scorpios. You rarely deviate from your prearranged priority status dictating whether brain or crotch gets to call the shots, but I urge you to this week, since your best courses of action will lie opposite your standard procedures. … [Read more...] about Your Horoscope
Instead
Your Horoscope
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) More than any other, your species has been painstakingly dissected and analyzed. I’m sure you poor Scorpios are sick of being studied so closely; these microscopic inquiries into your character are as annoying as they are invasive. You’ve done admirably well at preventing yourself from stinging those who seek to scrutinize the inscrutable, but enough … [Read more...] about Your Horoscope
Your Horoscope
Scorpio (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) Much of your bad luck is preventable. You may have been the victim of some of the shit the world throws at people—but that’s at least partially because you’ve been making yourself such a broad target, through a range of (or perhaps just one particularly effective) self-destructive behavior. Don’t be a martyr; it’s tiresome, and ultimately not all it’s … [Read more...] about Your Horoscope
Your Horoscope
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) I dreamt in you transformed into a polar bear who hunted seals with gleeful and effective violence. I took it to mean that you’ve recently grown enough snowy white emotional insulation that you can now brave icy and dangerous situations with impunity. Not only that, but you’ve grown to such massive size and ferocity that you’re now the biggest, baddest … [Read more...] about Your Horoscope
Your Horoscope
Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) You may not be able to speak Canine, but you can reasonably assume that when your dog lies down at your feet both of you experience some degree of comfort and pleasure. It’s just one minor example of the levels of communication you’re capable of. Since the exotic creature you’re trying to commune with this week is actually human, if completely … [Read more...] about Your Horoscope