Eh brah, way to make a scene at the resort pool the other day by yelling at the slide attendant. All she was doing was telling your kids to stay out of the part of the pool where riding the slide drops into. But clearly, her crime was apparently caring about your kids more than you do. But you showed her! “I don’t do rules!” you yelled at her in front of pretty much everyone at the resort. “No one dictates what I do when I’m on vacation!” Please, go back to Jersey or wherever it is that big dumbasses who hate women come from.
Illustration: Ron Pitts
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